"Gifted"

What do you guys understand by that word?

"Gifted"

I understand it as something that was given to you. Usually when something is given to you, you usually consider it special, right? Well I don't think I like that.

Let me tell you why...

My daughter..which is 4 ..according to her recent evaluation is "gifted". According to this evaluation she has the "intelligence" of that of a 2nd grader. How the hell they figured that out...I have no idea...but she is now in the "Gifted" program, if we so choose to place her there. This is where it gets ugly.

I don't see my child as "gifted" (special)...to me she is what every 4 year old should be ...curious, funny, limit testing, button pushing, you name it ...that's her. Yes, I have been reading to her since inside the womb, yes maybe I did play and sing some classical music every now and then and maybe just maybe I exaggerated while being in the hospital and read things beyond fairy tales and nursery rhymes. Yes, I would make a game out of learning and teaching her the numbers and letters and how to spell her name and how to tell time. Does that make my child gifted? Does she really absorb what is being said to her and process it like a child of 7 or 8 rather than like a 4 year old? If so...why the hell does she not listen when I tell her to put her toys away, or not to come in the kitchen when the stove is on, or not to bug the hell out of the dog?

Why? Let me tell you why...because she is 4 :)...and that is what 4 year olds do ...that is their thing. Yes she may be able to add 2 and 3 and know that its 5...but she still wants to play, she still wants to run around instead of competing with a bunch of kids on who finishes their work first. That is where I am stuck...

We sat to observe a "gifted" class for an hour...we read the schedule...all work ..no play..they want to get the most out of them..I did not like what I saw one bit...kids have their own desk...the room looks like a college classroom rather than a 3-4 year old class...there are no ABC's no 123's on the walls, those little cute projects ...are non existent...The teacher lectures not as she would a preschool aged child, but an elementary one...I honestly don't like it...and doubt my child will...

She is 4 ...we have treated her age appropriately since the day she was born...I have never said or thought..ok your smarter than what you should be let me treat you as such...she still loves spaghetti and gets it all over the place...she watches Dora the explorer instead of some National Geographic show..

She is my one and only...and although ..I know one day she will spread her wings and fly...I am in no hurry for that to happen...everything has its time and its purpose.

I wish, I could ask her ..do you want to be in the "Gifted" program...and she gave a yes or a no..it would be much easier...I know ..she wont like it...I know this..will I be a bad parent for pushing her or for holding her back? What if I push her to much? what if I don't push her enough?

Right now..I wish I were gifted..to know the future...to know what to do ...this is my child's future we are talking about...that is something I don't want to mess up....

...chelitta