To Whom It May Concern

I am sorry...

For giving up, on ever finding you. 

For not believing that you are out  there, in the world, probably looking for me as much as I have been looking for you.

I am sorry...

For thinking that I had found you 8 years ago...

It wasn't you.

I am sorry...

For living a life less than worthy of you. I have made many mistakes. I do not regret them, as they are what have made me today. I know, however, that some are not excusable and I live the consequences of them everyday of my life.

I am sorry...

I cant go on waiting for you. I feel that if I have not found you now, I wont anymore. The best years of my life have gone by. My heart has been broken beyond repair. My soul is damaged and I have no more desire to keep looking. I have nothing to offer you now.

I am sorry...

I have given up on the idea of growing old with you. Of loving you like no one else has ever loved you before. Of being your compliment, of being your partner, of being your friend, of being your lover, the mother of your children if you so wanted. There is nothing left of me anymore.

I am sorry ...
For choosing the wrong man to give my heart to. I also thought it was you, but it wasn't. It was what I thought you would be like, but I was wrong.

To Whom It May Concern...
I have given up on finding you...
Yet I hope you haven't given up on finding me...
because all I have left...is this love...that nobody seems to want...
it belongs to you ...

....chelitta